Friday, January 29, 2010

Are we buying death for our daughters????

This question just popped in my heart when I heard about Neha Chhikara. Well, for those of you who don’t know who she is hers a know facts about her- she was a normal girl like any of us girls out in the world, was a cabin crew with an airline, got married and all her happiness was gone (I personally don’t know her, but these are a few facts I could gather from newspapers). She got married to one Ankit Dalal from gurgaon and the family members alleged that her husband and in-laws have been harassing her for dowry soon after marriage. Well the wedding might be a grand affair because Neha’s parents had given Rs. 25, 00,000 as dowry to the Dalal family. That was their gesture to buy happiness for their darling daughter (I mean who would give such a huge amount as dowry if the daughter is not dear to them). But this sum of money was not enough to buy the happiness of their daughter. She was allegedly harassed at her in-laws home n even lost her job as crew member of the airline due to some physical torture (again got this fact from newspapers). But on the eve of New Year, 31 Dec, 2009, she committed suicide. Well this is one of the sad stories which luckily got published in the newspapers and could catch people’s attention.

Who should be held responsible for the murder of an innocent soul- the parents who gave in to the greedy demands of the in-laws or the in-laws who just kept on increasing their demands day and night? What if the parents wouldn’t have given in to the demands of the other family at first instance? What if the girl herself had denied getting married to such a person for whom the materials were more important than the person she was? Maybe a murder would have been avoided. The sorrow, the pain could have been averted. But nobody might have thought that one wrong step could lead to such a dire consequence. The step of giving-in to the demands.

Many can relate to this story. It can be a plea of countless people out in the world, especially in the places where the ills like DOWRY are still present. How does it feel to hear a girl dying because of the boundless greed of the in- laws. Why even after 60 years of being Republic we cant assure our girls a safe life after wedding too? What is the meaning of us being a free country, a democratic nation? Still girls are either committing suicide who can not take any more pressure of the families or are being burned alive because they are of no particular use to anybody. Well, the role of each and every person concerned is questionable.

The parents in the false hope that if they can give handsome dowry for their daughters can buy them a blissful married life, try and meet all the demands. But they forget that this way they were just buying deaths for their daughters, because greed is one thing which can never be satisfied. It is a vicious circle which only ends with the death of a girl. Why the mother-in- law forgets that a few years ago she was in the same shoes. If her mother-in-law would have driven her crazy for dowry, she would have died early on.

The in-laws who demand all the material comforts, don’t they have any heart? Can’t they see the wedding itself is a grand affair in a country like ours, and then they further burden the other family for still more demands.

The girl herself has an important role in making her life more respectable and more meaningful after marriage. Just a simple and stern NO for the person who demands in the name of keeping you happy. Such a person can neither be happy himself nor can he keep you happy. Also that, at any point, don’t just give in to the tortures you are going through. Raise your voice at the first point of torture- be it mental or physical. It is your life and it is your right to lead it the way you want it to. Earn respect and don’t fool yourself by trying to buy happiness.